"Hamburgers, I guess," Dana said. "That's all we have defrosted."
"Well, don't we got nothing frozen, like a pizza or something that you can pop in?"
Dana opened the freezer, then shook her head. "Just frozen hamburger. Do you want me to run to the store to get something else?"
"Yeah, might be a good idea. I'm getting tired of eatin' burgers."
"What would you like me to get?"
"Oh, I don't know. Anything you make'll be fine."
"Do you want to go to the store while I'm doing the dishes?
Vern shook his head and laughed. "Can't do that. A Team's on."
"I'll go as soon as I'm done with the dishes." Dana tried not to sound defeated. She was resigned to the idea that her duties were to look after the upkeep of their home, perform maid and errand services, and provide a second income. Vern's duty was to provide the primary income and keep a constant flow of his favorite beer coming and going from the refrigerator.
After Dana finished washing the dishes and there was a commercial break during Vern's T.V. program, she kissed Vern on the cheek and announced, "I'll see what's at the grocery store, then I'll be right back. That working man's appetite can wait until then, can't it?"
"Guess it'll have to Dana dear," Vern grinned. "Love you sweets."
"Love you, too," Dana said, smiling back.
Dana still did love the man she had married. He never ordered her to perform her errands, but she always did whatever he asked. But, she knew her life in the mobile home with Vern could be happier if Vern would help.
After Dana returned from the store with some fish sticks and frozen french fries, Vern met her at the doorsteps with his jacket on. Lighting up a cigarette, Vern announced, "The guys are playing pool tonight down at Willy's. Darryl just called and said he wants to take care of his bets with me. That means he wants to double-or-nothing me. He's an easy mark. Gotta go. I won't be too late."
Dana held in the immediate rage. "But I just rushed down to the store, waited in line, and fought the traffic to get you your dinner." Dana hoped this didn't come out too harsh. "Why don't we eat dinner here first."
"Don't you worry none about me, Dana-doll," Vern said, proud of his wife concern about him being fed. "I'll eat something down at Willy's. Later sweets." He put his hand behind her head, kissed her lips, then got into his truck.
Dana knew that Vern would be back, after having budgeted his drinks through the night. He wouldn't be drunk, and he wouldn't be chasing other woman. But he wouldn't be home. And that's what she really wanted; just a husband to be home with her.
But of course, Dana didn't know that.
She just knew something about Vern should change.
Dana understood that Vern wouldn't change overnight. And she wouldn't know how to go about making him different.
She turned on the oven to prepare her fish sticks, then turned on the radio to have something talking to her.
Dana had to look at the dial twice when their favorite country station continued a news report that lasted longer than usual. At first this report alarmed Dana, but then she felt the topic was more unusual than frightening.
At first the story stated:
Later, in a calmer tone, the announcer began mentioning:
Strange weather and kids stealing things. This was curious, but it was nothing to cause a station from playing some good George Strait music.
Dana felt better when a familiar tune finally came on the radio. She even became relaxed after hearing a few more songs that reminded her of riding in a truck down the highway. But then the announcer continued his reports between songs. He wasn't as cheerful as the other D.J.'s, and Dana imagined he wore a dark suit and had droopy eyes that cast down on dull paper.
Mrs. Bertha Johnston reports that her cantankerous husband Dick has been unusually quiet. He looks normal on the outside, but he now suddenly wants to return home right after work and help clean their house.
Mrs. Ingrid Hubbard has told sheriff deputies that she nearly fainted when her husband Wilbur had willingly made their bed before leaving for work this morning. She immediately called the sheriff's office when Mr. Hubbard had decided to cancel his fishing trip and visit her mother this weekend.
More on this story as it develops."
Out of coincidence, the radio then broadcast a commercial about a sale on produce at a local grocery store. Out of curiosity, Dana went to their storage shed out next to the carport. She smiled when she noticed that the few baked potatoes she had bought last week were now missing.
This could be worthwhile.
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The complete version of "Invasion Of The Boring People" is from my book of short stories |
